Dealing With Insecurity

Insecurity is a killer of relationships but especially long distance ones. This is because there is so much to angst about in a long distance relationship. There are all the ifs, whats, wheres and whens. If you are a nervous or sensitive individual who easily loses their faith in the future then you may not have what it takes to handle a long distance relationship.

Confident individuals with healthy self-respect and self-esteem best handle long distance relationships. Insecure individuals have trouble facing challenges so they may not survive the many challenges posed by a long distance relationship.

Insecurity may also prevent you from telling your long distance partner what you want from your relationship. You might be too nice, and he or she might take you for granted.

There are three things that you should do to avoid expressing your insecurity to your online partner. Insecurity is unattractive and ultimately leads to codependence in a relationship.

• Avoid describing yourself as helpless or hopeless when your partner is around. Using phrases like "life is just not worth living without you" puts too much pressure on your partner.

• Never put yourself down when talking on the phone or online. Don't make excuses for yourself. Nobody expects you to be perfect except for your inner critic.

• Don't beg for attention or demand answers. Demanding behavior makes you look like a bratty child and is a definite turn off for your long distance partner who may even be provoked to anger because he or she can't solve your depression or anxiety problem.